2006

2006's letter featured a post it note overlay from me with the letter written by "Jack". It was a visual that doesn't entirely reproduce here, but I included the post it note text which overlay the top part of the letter.

 Christmas 2006

 Dear Family,

 We at the Martin Family hope that you all had a wonderful fiscal 2006 and that all your plans were realized. Beyond that and furthermore, we wish that the remaining 3 quarters of fiscal 2007 and the first of fiscal 2008 bring you happiness and pleasure, although in a manner purely consistent with practices of the US Department of Justice.

 Whereby we typically write an all encompassing summary of the year’s events for your enjoyment, we are duly distributing same to you this year. To all of our friends and relatives, we would like… umm….

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Hi. Hi hi hih ih ihihi,

Hi. My name is Jack.

My Daddy is asleep in my big red chair, but I can’t sleep. Daddy left his computer on. I thought it only played cards, but it’s fun to push the letter buttons too!! I’ll let Daddy sleep and tell u all about what I did this year.

It was a very long year. It seemed like it took forever go to by!! I mean I wasn’t born yesterday. But this year was like six last years, and it’s still going!!! Who knows when it will end. All I know is I hope it’s soon, cause after every year I get cake!!!

I love my new sister. Her name is Alexandra and my mom calls her Alex but she likes to be called Ali and now she spells it Aly. It’s confusing to me too. She makes me laugh whenever I see her, and she plays with me a lot. Aly is in 6th grade now, which is middle school here. She is getting so big and grown up. Aly is very fashionable too. Her outfits could all use a little drool, so I help out with that. She shops, bargain shops, sews things, and wears lots of outfits that are very pretty and has cool toys like an iPod that I like to put in my mouth and chew on. She wears something called accessories, but I like to put those in my mouth too, but Aly locks me out her room sometimes cause there are lots of chew toys all over the bed and the floor that Mommy said I can’t have.

Aly likes middle school. She gets to go to 5 different classes every day and has a locker. I don’t even get to go to one class! Her favorites are math and art, but she likes language arts and science too. She’s doing really well with her grades, and setting the bar really high for me. Thanks a lot, sister. She has lots of friends too, and they come over all the time to play with her and me. Sometimes they bounce me on the trampoline. They pick me up and say “ohh, cute baby” in really high pitched girlie voices, and they pass me around. They are really cute girls, so I’m getting a lot of experience with older girls which will come in handy in like first grade or something.

<p class="MsoNormal">I did a lot with my family this year, and it was fun, from what I remember. Back when I was little, in the Spring, we went on an airplane ride to Florida! It was great, except for the screaming kids across the aisle. Sheesh. But Florida was great. Seems like a nice place to move later in life, like when I’m 5 or 6. We went to the beach, and Mommy put my feet in the water. It was cold, and I couldn’t stand up. Plus the sun was in my eyes and my bathing suit was riding up. And I had a peepee diaper. But other than that it was awesome. That was Aly’s spring break.

<p class="MsoNormal">In June we went to visit grandma Linda and grandpa Ron in Arizona. Mommy and Daddy took us to the Grand Canyon. It was even bigger than I’d imagined, and I hadn’t even imagined it!!! I got to see Uncle Chad and Aunt Sharon and play on the floor at their house. My sister got heatstroke, so that’s the plus side for me as the younger brother. Mommy and sister hiked down into the Grand Canyon for a while, and took pictures. That sounds really cool and I’m going to do it some day when my legs are longer.

<p class="MsoNormal">During the rest of the year, I had fun with Mommy and Daddy and Sister. We’ve done lots of fun classes. We did Kindermusik where I get to watch Mommy sing. We did Baby Sign Language where I get to watch Daddy and Mommy sing. We did swimming where I get to watch Mommy in a bathing suit sing. And we had play group about once a week with a bunch of my friends and their moms. They don’t sing there, but they talk about us babies and laugh and cry a lot about being mommies. They are a little emotional if you ask me, but I’m just a baby, so I don’t pay that much attention as long as the bottles keep flowing!

<p class="MsoNormal">I got to know Grandpa Bob a lot. He came to watch me almost every week and some other times too on the weekends with Grammy Rebecca. He’s kind of strange, but at least now I can see where Daddy gets it. We had great fun bonking heads, laughing and walking around with his finger. I let him tickle me a lot and encourage him to make funny noises. It’s great. In September he watched me for a couple days while Mommy and Sister went up to New York City with Daddy. Daddy was doing work, and Mommy and Aly went shopping and had an awesome time. Aly got a Prada bag that was so nice that when she brought it to Daddy’s office one of the Special Agents asked for the name of the lady that sold it to her!! They really liked finding all kinds of bargains and high fashion gear. I still think footie jammies are all the rage.

<p class="MsoNormal">Aly had her birthday in May where she was 11. Mommy and Daddy call her ‘tween something and something else. For her birthday she had a sleepover and played Dance Dance Revolution on the big screen and had makeovers for her friends. The girls all had great fun, but not me. It’s hard to play Dance Dance Revolution when all you can do is sit on your butt and I don’t do lip gloss.

<p class="MsoNormal">My birthday in October was great too! Great Grandma Peg came from Georgia to visit again. She’s awesome and Mommy and Daddy and Grandpa Bob love it when she comes to visit. She brings great toys, like my crib aquarium. Those fish are so cool. Grandma Linda and Grandpa Ron came also from Arizona, and stayed for a while. Cousin Doug and Cousin Lorraine were here too for my birthday dinner. Grandma and Grandpa Fanti were here. Aunt Susie and Uncle Paul and cousins JP and Willie also came. We had a great time. I played with the wrapping paper. Mommy stripped me down to a diaper and let me roll around in my blue cake. It was shaped like the Baby Einstein Inchworm and I loved it!!! Daddy says the video will be on the internet soon, whatever that means.

<p class="MsoNormal">I had several key milestones this year, Mommy tells me. I have been 50% for weight all year, which they say is good. I started off at 95% for height, but now I’m down to 70%. Daddy says if I don’t pick up the pace there will be no college for me. I didn’t really crawl until I was about 9 months. I was letting the other kids in the play group work out all the kinks in the process for me. I then moved on to walking at around my birthday week.

<p class="MsoNormal">So I have been walking ever since then. When everybody was here, it was great cause they’d walk me around and let me hold on to their finger. If they let go, I’d just fuss a little and they’d come right back. Suckers. It was awesome. Then when they all left, it wasn’t so fun anymore, so I just started walking around. It’s cool and all, but I’m really looking forward to learning to fly.

<p class="MsoNormal">Daddy’s 40 this year, so it’s fun to make him run around and watch his body slowly fall apart. Mommy had a birthday too, but the number is really big and she doesn’t like it. Daddy gave her some rocks for her ears and I really like rocks but she really, really likes rocks! She is doing some volunteering at a women’s shelter and at Aly’s school and she’s thinking of taking some classes next year, so I’ll finally have some time alone to do those Chemistry experiments I’ve been thinking about. If only they’d leave the bleach in an unlocked cabinet!

<p class="MsoNormal">So that’s about it for my busy year. I can’t keep up the baby act too much longer, so next year I’ll probably start to walk better and run and talk so they understand me. If I hear them say “Doggie, that’s a doggie, can you say Doggie?” one more time, I’m going to hurl. But it has been fun. So happy holidays to all of you out there reading this. It’s been a really good first year for me, I guess. Although I don’t have much to compare it to. Keep the toys comin’. Nothing tastes quite as good as fresh Chinese plastic.

Love, Jack Jack